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The Vets Archives
Just in case you are the slightest bit interested, I have archived the previous Vets News Pages from January 2001. It's quite interesting to look back on a few of the events that have occurred during our past games, some of them amusing and some of them downright sad. Click the button at the top.

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Best 5 a side goal ever


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New Mills Vets  5 a side football at the
Leisure Centre New Mills High Peak
17:30 - 19:00 every Sunday evening.
Come and join us, all you need is a pair of trainers and a dodgy kit and you're up and gasping for air.



Some of our YouTube's

Penalty or What?
Bryn Misses a Sitter
Only One Winner Here
Paulo Strikes Like Larsson

Proudy & Ron
 Michael Jackson
 Evans Above

  Will Ron ever score?

Vets Hall of Fame  The Vets Archives

Some of Mary's Moaners have faith in the powers above.

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Also Coming soon
VETS PLAYER OF THE YEAR

will be presented during December 2013
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The Vets Archives

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Sessions with  Walton Wednesday

a superb site excellently put
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Sunday 24th November 2013 : The Vets moved into a new dimension tonight as we paraded the magnificent five over 60's players who joined to form our oldest ever team and, I suspect the oldest ever 5 a side team in the surrounding areas. Myself, Keith Mastin, John Goodwin, Nigel Caldwell and our latest  Sexagenarian, Chris Anthony. The opposition representing our youth team were Rick Pott, Ade Hewitt, Chris Todd, James Kemp and Malc Stubbs. The  Sexagenarians' started a little nervously but as the old bones started to function the experience kicked in and Keith Mastin burst through to net a superb individual opener. The Youth team stepped up the pace and pushed hard for an equaliser and after Ade Hewitt had tested out the pointing on the concrete block walls Chris Todd found a chink in the Cocoon's impressive defence and struck a well placed goal to level the scores. It must be said that you can't ever underestimate the resolve of a bunch of Seniors and after a skirmish just inside my own half I shook off the attentions of James Kemp and  Malc Stubbs and unleashed a monumental drive into the far bottom corner of Paulo's net, as good a goal as I can ever remember scoring  at the Leisure Centre to put us 2-1 up. Shortly after Chris Anthony slipped a lovely ball inside to Nigel Caldwell and we all held our breath as time seemed to stand still, however, Nige turned back the years and walloped the ball into the bottom corner of the youth teams net to be greeted by great celebrations.  Could the youth team come back, could the old boys hang on? John Goodwin was defending like a man possessed and gave no quarter, and after over 25 years of vets sessions there are many who will vouch for his ability to do just that.  We may be in our sporting twilight years but there was no way we were going to let this one slip and when you see Chris Anthony chasing from box to box you know you're on a winner. The final whistle was greeted like a 6-1 win for City at OT with much warm applause from the watching throng, a fine win that took me back to August 2002 when we played our first over 50's match with myself, Johnboy, Keith, Tony Moore and Tony Gavin a fine game which again was victorious beating a much younger team 4-3.
So the inevitable question - will we ever be able to put out an over 70's team? You can never say never but with the present available players I personally would be 77 by the time our fifth player reached the 70 mark and there is every possibility that my speed would have started to desert me by then so, I think that a more sensible target would be a team of pensioners, we'll see.
Anyway the session continued with three teams with the Reds predicatively running out the best team on the night showing a clean pair of heels to the Shirts and the Yellows losing only one game all evening, that was to the yellows in their first outing. Nigel Caldwell scooped the player of the week award for his efforts with the Yellows and the over 60's team. My team were watching Nigel during a game against the Reds where much younger players were finding it nigh on impossible to get past him with tackle after tackle, outstanding.  Mike Adrio chipped in with a few cameos and Paolo kept plugging away for the Yellows but it was Zsu Zsu who caught the eye hitting goal scoring form again. My team the Shirts had our moments but overall we were short on  hitting the net although Phil Butler managed a few however, with our more than frequent chances it should have been more. I have to say it was a rattling good nights footy though and added to that Chris Anthony and myself were at the Etihad earlier in the afternoon to drool over another fabulous goal fest as City stuffed Spurs 6-0.                                                       More Pictures next week, thanks to Phil Butler.
 

 Tonight's Teams

 
YELLOWS
Paulo Garner
John Goodwin
Keith Mastin
Mike Adrio
Nigel Caldwell

REDS
Rick Pott
Ade Hewitt
Anthony Graham
James Kemp
Rick Westwood

SHIRTS
Chris Todd,
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough

Malc Stubbs
Phil Butler
 
  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday 1st December 2013 : Missed the footie tonight as Man City needed my presence at the Etihad however, I'm confident one of my trusted contributors will email me a report on tonight's action which will appear on this very page shortly after.    And here it is : 
The First Day of December saw the return of a rampant Richard Evans to strengthen Marys Moaners, bringing his direct and enthusiastic style of play to this evening’s festive frolic. In the thick of things from the start, scoring plenty of his solo trademark goals, and dishing out some early Christmas presents - a nice double shin scraper on Rick Pott and a wonderfully undisguised yuletide ankle cracker on Ade Hewitt. Later while on goal-keeping duty he stopped a close range full blooded shot from our resident police officer with his nose, leaving him prostrate and face down. In between all this mayhem, Player of the Week Johnboy Goodwin was in irresistible form scoring five or six as the Moaners built on an early five game unbeaten run. Chris Podmore and ZsuZsu Mastin were also on the score sheet. Keith Proudfoot spoilt the party bringing the run to an unceremonious end, smashing in a lovely unopposed brace from Chris Anthony territory. Proudy was clearly enjoying his new-found freedom and benefited from the fine passing of Mike Adrio. Nigel Caldwell continued his form from last week popping up with some quality goals, bolstered by his solid as a rock defending, whilst James Kemp was rewarded for his shift netting with a neatly taken finish from the edge of the area.
For the Yellows Anthony Graham found the net after a sensational jinking run. Richard Westwood was on target from distance with an unstoppable shot like an arrow into the bottom corner of the onion bag. Ade Hewitt and Rick Pott although both scoring were not as prolific as in recent weeks, being frustrated by the woodwork and some high and handsome shooting. Paulo left it to late in the final game to break his duck, then set up ZsuZsu to slot home a cracker after a flowing move. In the end a very enjoyable night’s football although if Santa was watching events on pay-per-view, some players are still on the naughty list…………………..You know who you are.

Many Thanks go to our guest reporter for a better than expected report under  such seemingly controversial circumstances - wooooh, sorry I missed this one.....

 

  Tonight's Teams

Mary's Moaners
Paul Garner
Keith Mastin  Richard Evans 
John Goodwin 
Chris Podmore
    

YELLOWS

Anthony Graham  Rick Westwood 
Ade Hewitt  
Rick Pott
    

SHIRTS

Mike Adrio
Nigel Caldwell  Keith Proudfoot James Kemp

 

 

 

 

Sunday 8th December 2013 : After missing last weeks controversial kick fest I made sure my dodgy shin was well wrapped up for my return to the action at the Leisure Centre tonight. Chris Anthony and myself were released from watching duties at the Etihad to bolster the Shirts team which included Proudy and Cov City fan, James Kemp who had completed a ten mile run earlier in the day. This didn't seem to effect James too much although he could have used it as an excuse for some wayward finishing however, his ceaseless effort was never in doubt and was a factor in the Shirts coming out on top of the pile with only two defeats over the ninety minutes. Chris and myself both put in a shift but Proudy was in a tremendous scoring vein banging them in from everywhere. I can't remember a night where he has hit the onion bag so often, Luis Suárez had nowt on our rampant Rover, easily earning him player of the week. A problem in the making with the Mary's Moaners who seem to have discarded their leader Zsu Zsu Mastin who transferred his services to the Reds. This provided great support to Ade, Rick Pott and Anthony Graham who bore the brunt of the Reds attacking duties, some of Zsu Zsu's probing passes bordered on the excellent especially from an old Cockney Hippie. Rick Pott's mazy run followed by a ripping match winner against the Shirts was greeted by a huge cheer, mainly from himself but, a cracking strike anyway. The Yellows (formally known as Mary's Moaners) were up and down like Zebedee on heat with all players managing to bang in a blinder over the ninety minutes but non better than the two Mike Adrio smacked in during their final game. Good to see Dave Brown back in action after having his glasses destroyed stopping a full bloodied volley a couple of weeks ago, it doesn't seem to have effected his confidence as he and Paulo steadied the Yellows creaking defence.

Just a note tonight about one of our own who tragically took his own life 3½ years ago. Robbie Westwood's daughter Laura (Richard Westwood's sister), is running the London marathon in April next year hoping to raise money to support the Charity "Mind". Take a minute to check out the following link which will go towards understanding why those of us who knew Robbie still miss the little fella so much, we will never forget him.  I have chipped in with £20 from the vets funds on our behalf after Proudy spotted the appeal on Facebook. 
http://memoryspace.mind.org.uk/MyPage/My-lovely-Dad-Robin-Westwood.

 
Tonight's Teams

 YELLOWS
Paul Garner
Richard Evans 
John Goodwin 
Chris Podmore
Mike Adrio
    
 
 REDS
Anthony Graham  Dave Brown 
Ade Hewitt
Rick Pott
Keith Mastin


SHIRTS

Keith Proudfoot James Kemp
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough
  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday 15th December 2013 : The Christmas Future team were back in business tonight putting the other two teams to the sword before they got out of the blocks. Lead by the elfish inform Anthony Graham, who set up a feast of goals for fellow juveniles Dan Bailey and Rick Westwood. Exploiting the space created by the energy and movement of James Kemp, plus a roller-skating Rick Pott, they were a force to be reckoned with. Almost as formidable where the Christmas Present team. Benefiting from the return of Paul Dennis adding his calming influence to his four, fiery and ferocious team mates. Keith Proudfoot again swept in some crackers, Malc Stubbs linked up well with Dave Brown , while Rick Evans wrestled once more with his inner Grinch. That just leaves the Christmas Past It team.  Chris Podmore was their best player giving 100% and grabbing most of the goals. Zsu Zsu and Jonny boy earned their stripes, Paulo and Mike Adrio contributed more humour than anything else as the whole team were bashed, buffeted and bruised by their opponents.  Remarkably Christmas Past’s only two wins of the night were against Christmas Future, this included a thirteen pass move finally tucked into the net by Chris Podmore.

Other goals to remember…………………..A Dan Bailey screamer, Rick Evans brace of net busters, Malc Stubbs and Dave Browns sensationally similar, solo side footers. Also on Target was Rick Pott with some quality finishes, however it was back to the floor for Rick tonight who almost masochistically hit the deck in various unimaginable incidents that only he can explain. Top team was Christmas Future, but player of the week goes to Chris Podmore for carrying his team mates and never letting his head drop. One more week left before Santa brings the vets, ankle supports, knee supports, Deep Heat, Cod liver oil, Ibuprofen and perhaps another dodgy retro shirt or three, to keep our old legs going for another year.

Another fine report by our guest writer. It's never easy putting all the names to all the incidents, as I find out every week. My usual procedure after returning home is to have a light supper and a glass of red before nodding off on the sofa watching the X factor results. After another glass of red to wake me up I sit down in front of my old PC and start to reflect on the 90 minutes of 5 a side that has by now started to become a fading memory. Trying not to use repetitive phrases is an increasingly difficult thing to achieve after close on 13 years of reports but, the guest writers always manage to add a little variation in a good way so, they are most welcome. To this end if anybody wishes to add their own style to the reports, just let me know on the night and the page is yours. I don't censor content but do request that language is kept to an acceptable level.
So, here's your chance to have a go as my excellent previous guests have done - and possibly allow me to get to bed earlier!! This offer doesn't apply to Scouse Ron who is threatening a come back.

Tonight's Teams

CHRISTMAS PAST    IT 
Paul Garner
Mike Adrio
Keith Mastin
John Goodwin  Chris Podmore

CHRISTMAS PRESENT  
Rick Evans
Keith Proudfoot  Malc Stubbs
James Kemp
Paul Dennis

 CHRISTMAS  FUTURE
Anthony Graham  Rick Westwood  Dan Bailey
Rick Pott
Dave Brown

 

 

Sunday 22nd December 2013 : One O Clock KO, would it work - yes siree it sure did. A somewhat relaxing atmosphere at the Leisure Centre tonight rewarded the players with a contest to assess just who was up for an early kick off especially with  all our sexagenarians on view. It soon became clear that my recent weight gain was going to leave this particular pensioner struggling to re-fill his lungs as quick as they were emptying. There are many orifices built in to the human frame and all of mine were working overtime however, as I looked round one or two others were feeling the effects of their lunch time "snacks" and pre Christmas excesses. Although my team, the Santa's Slickers were equipped with only four players we set the early pace with only one loss in the first half mainly due to some superb finishing from Ade Hewitt. Mary's Moaners were building up a head of steam with both Rick Evans and Paul Garner both hitting spectacular goals. The spirit of Christmas descended on Rick Evans later in the session as he discovered a neatly struck shot placed rather than blasted was the way to go and it was a very successful transformation at that especially after  removing a good portion of pointing from the concrete blocks surrounding the goals earlier on. As the session entered it's latter stages Mary's Xmas Moaners three over 60's started to feel the pace. Some whispers of over the hill circulated the playing area but, as I myself am aware, when you go over the hill you always pick up speed on the other side. The Young Xmas Guns added their own brand of quick fire footy that can only be found in the under 30's to the 50's with Anthony Graham in particular notching a bag full of classy goals, the only thing that slows up this boy is the pre match fag! Great to see Rick Pott survive a whole year without breaking a bone or three - a few bruises and considerable damage to the floor having been shrugged off leaves Rick ready for the Challenge in 2014.
So the last session of 2013 left the three teams on very level par to leave another 12 months of successful jousts to look forward to and, hopefully we'll continue to enjoy our football into the New Year however, the rumoured return of Panto villains Bryn (he's behind you) Meredith and Ron (**** off ref) Buttery may well introduce that edge which still makes me shudder.... oh no it won't - oh yes it will - oh.....
Have a good Christmas and Healthy Happy New Year everybody and be prepared for the next episode of VETS 5 a SIDE FOOTY on the 5th January next year.


Tonight's Teams

 Marys Xmas
 Moaners

Paul Garner
Rick Evans
Keith Mastin
John Goodwin  Nigel Caldwell

Santa's Slickers   
Malc Hough
Chris Anthony
James Kemp
Ade Hewitt

 Young Xmas Guns
 and Rick Pott
 
Anthony Graham  Rick Westwood 
James Kemp
Rick Pott
Dave Brown

 

 

 

 

 

SUNDAY 5th January 2014 : Food and Alcohol are every sportsman's enemy especially in the amounts that I consumed over the festive period so, it was no surprise that I found my lungs on the verge of surrendering after the first game. With a paunch the size of a bag of cement to carry round I have made my mind up to join the gym and start my squash again to get in some sort of shape -fat chance methinks.
The New Year always gives the vets the chance to be the first goal scorer and this year a sweetly struck drive into the corner of the Shirts net by Rick Westwood was one to remember. He joins a list of others in the past few years such as, Chris Podmore (2011 &12), Mike Adrio (2010), Nigel Caldwell (2009), Keith Proudfoot (2007 & 08), Steve Hart (2006), Bryn Meredith (2005), Malc Hough (2004), Chris Anthony (2003), Gary Sharp (2001). Great to see most of those are still playing.
Some other first's tonight - Rick Pott, the first hat-trick of 2014 - Mike Adrio, the first headed goal in 2014 - Johnboy committed the first foul of 2014 and Anthony Graham became  the first player of the week in 1024.
Highlight of tonight's session was hearing half way through that Man Utd had lost at home, yet again, in the days final FA Cup match, looks like Moyes is on borrowed time. As for the football, the Youngish Guns were the team of the night with the two Ricks receiving great support from Mike Adrio and Anthony Graham. Anthony himself was in fine form and early doors it looked like his team may just threaten the 100% winning record which as yet has not been achieved after 25 years, Mary's Moaners were their biggest threat and are look quite a well balanced team these days. Zsu Zsu, my fellow pensioner, looked quite spritely in spite of his lack of action leading up to the
Epiphany, tonight he marshalled his fellow moaners to great effect.
My team were bolstered by the inclusion of guest James Kemp wearing his Cov City brown kit and, the return of Steve Gerrard who looks like he may be expecting twins at any moment. Thankfully for Steve he will soon be back in shape with the extra running required to cover our over 60's players, mainly me and Chris Anthony. We only managed one win and a few draws but we all survived to play another week. Interesting fact - all my team scored two goals each tonight!  Hopefully we'll have Proudy back next week to gel the squad together. in the mean-time, Steve Gerrard's transfer request has been turned down.
Finally it was pointed out that my first five touches tonight were all over head height, all I can say is the next five weren't.
 
This weeks Teams

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

SUNDAY 12th January 2014 : What a pleasure tonight to see Nigel Caldwell presented with the Vets Player of the Year Shield for 2013. I am so pleased we have the likes of Nigel in our numbers as he encapsulates everything that is good about our group. Although fast approaching pensioner status Nigel retains the energy and skill levels to play in any one of our regular squads. Ask any player who is the most difficult vet to get past with the ball, besides the assassin, and they will give Nigel the shout. Add to that, his discipline is exemplarily and an example to us all - I've never heard him argue with the ref or cuss since he and his mate Harry joined us 10 years ago this week and, for all these reasons I say well done Nigel a deserved award.
As for the football this week I have to say it wasn't the finest example of skill and excitement. Dan Bailey picked up a foot injury early doors and had to call it a night, the only plus for him was not having to pay his subs. Mary's Moaners and The Youngish Guns were too close to separate when it came to picking the best team on the night but Rick Evans were the pick of the players earning him player of the week. In spite of a couple of tasty tackles, Rick for once kept cool and stuck to the task of finding the net. In the first game I was in goal and completely lost my bearings whacking Rick's ankles at least a yard outside the area as he bore down on goal. Not my only indiscretion as in the final game I was slow leaving the hall as the next game began and unbelievably set about tackling two players from the teams who started the next game - senior moment or just plain crazy, who knows. Not my best night, in fact probably my worst ever, just not good enough.
Ade Hewitt returned after his break in South Africa and looked a little rusty but still managed to end up being The Shirts top scorer. Mike Adrio, last years Vets Player of the Year showed us a few examples of how the game should be played with some outstanding skills. Steve Gerrard is starting to get back into the groove and Chris Podmore also continues to impress.
Paulo Garner has been crocked playing for his Walton Wednesday and expects to miss a few weeks, here's to a speedy recovery Paulo, the Moaners or the Vets sessions aren't the same without you.
 

 

 

 Marys  Moaners
Keith Mastin
Nigel Caldwell
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans


 The Shirts
Malc Hough
Chris Anthony
Chris Todd
Steve Gerrard
Ade Hewitt

 Youngish  Guns
Rick Pott
Mike Adrio
Anthony Graham
James Kemp
Dan Bailey

 

 

 

SUNDAY 19th January 2014 : I read in the Sunday broadsheet this morning that Gareth Bale the worlds most expensive player has added waiters and servants to the staff in his Madrid mansion. What is happening, he's just a bloody footballer isn't he? Mind you to a lesser degree I added a window cleaner to the list of workers (mainly me and the wife) that service my New Mills pile this week. Staying on the football theme, fifteen proper footballers hit the Leisure Centre floor running tonight in a quite competitive 5 a side session. The Not So Young Guns had the best of the action with a very well balanced team. James Kemp was embroiled in a battle with team mate Rick Pott in a contest to see who could hit the deck most spectacularly, it was a close call but James ability to bounce higher just nicked it. Anthony Graham and Ade Hewitt were equally in competition for top goal scorer on the night with Anthony just shading that one especially in his second game with a fine hat-trick. Mary's Moaners and the shirts were left to scrap for the runners up spot and with a late flourish from the Shirts it just about ended equal. Mike Adrio earned the player of the week award especially after treating at least half a dozen of us to various nut megs, drag backs, defence piercing passes and other cameos from his skilful repertoire. Proudy's  return to my Shirts squad gave us a more solid shape but in general we suffered a dose of wayward shootingitus. Chris Todd in fairness weighed in with a decent haul and Stevie Gerrard had his moments but too often we came up short when faced with the old onion bag. Mary's moaners were a mixed bag with Chris Podmore getting through his usual 120% and Rick Evans whacking in a few goals as well as, err just whacking a few, init!  Nigel Caldwell was baring the full weight of being Player of the Year tonight but, one or two moments left me thinking, yeah, class act Nige.
So the burning question of the week for the City fans amongst us is - Nine goals since last weeks session, how many before next weeks. Oh, and didn't Stretford United have a game today??
REPORTED MISSING LIST - Neil McLennon, The English Brothers, Bud Jackson, Malc Stubbs and Josh Mackie
INJURED LIST : Paulo Garner
 

 Marys  Moaners
Keith Mastin
Nigel Caldwell
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans
Mike Adrio

 The Shirts
Malc Hough
Chris Anthony
Chris Todd
Steve Gerrard
Keith Proudfoot

 Not So Young Guns

Rick Pott
Ade Hewitt
Anthony Graham
James Kemp
Dave Brown

 

 

 

 

 

 

SUNDAY 26th January 2014 : What a week for football - Stockport County won, Stretford United dumped themselves out of the League Cup with an abysmal penalty shoot out, City notched up their 110th goal so far this season and qualified for the League Cup Final and the n5th round of the FA Cup. So it was no surprise that the vets put on a bumper show when the 100% win record was seriously threatened after nearly 26 years. The Yellows came within a whisker of becoming the first team to win all their games over the ninety minutes. Paulo Garner, Chris Podmore, Mike Adrio and Rick Evans thoroughly deserved to be joint players of the week after a super hard fought session where they came within one loss to pick up the honour. It was a perfect team on the night seeing Paulo shake off his recent injury to great effect. Rick Evans and Mike Adrio did the majority of goal scoring thanks to the work of Chris Podmore who worked like a Polish illegal. My team, the Shirts put in an improved shift from last week but in fairness again found goal scoring a problem. However we were the team that beat the Yellows with a fine all round team effort which belied some of our previous slip ups. The Reds huffed and puffed through the ninety minutes just about edging the Shirts in the head to heads. Ade threatened the nets a few times and Rick was on the mark but no match for the rampant Yellows. So another all round impressive session with lots of good footy and one or two iffy refereeing decisions which all go the make our 5 a side what it is. A bit odd with no Young Guns on show and a distinct lack of bite from the missing Assassin.

Just in case you missed it - Stretford United fan dials 999 (click play)

 Tonight's Teams

 
YELLOWS
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans

Mike Adrio

REDS
Rick Pott
Ade Hewitt

James Kemp
Keith Mastin

SHIRTS
Chris Todd,
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough

Keith Proudfoot
Steve Gerrard

 

SUNDAY 2nd February 2014 : A fast and furious session with lots of good football, a spattering of controversial incidents, goals galore and the usual moaning at the referee but, very enjoyable for all that. Mary's Moaners, blessed with the return of Johnboy Goodwin from his Thailand training base we were treated to a couple of very skilfully taken flicked goals from the bronzed destroyer. Looking relaxed and in an unusually cheery persona, John breezed through the 90 minutes without a single misdemeanour to his name, is this the calm before the storm or have the Thai holistic time balance relaxation methods replenished his gentler side, watch this space.
As for the Moaners, Rick basted his way through the games with a couple of hat tricks and some. Podders, Zsu Zsu and Paulo all got stuck in to good effect, Paulo especially is looking like he's conquering his injury woes. The Reds made a decent fist of it with Dave Brown and Nigel Caldwell the steadying balance as James Kemp and Rick Pott battled away for the honour of Superhero with some classic coming together clashes. It's one thing when you hit an opposing attacker at 100 miles per hour with a full bloodied head on tackle but when you do it to a team mate it usually ends in disaster. When Kempo and Pottie collided in such an incident it must have registered pretty high on the Richter Scale. Rick is well used to hitting the deck but no doubt in my mind when I say Kempo is just not built for it unless he wears some American Grid Iron armour. Just for this alone Rick & James were awarded the players of the week.
My team the shirts drafted Ade Hewitt in on a free transfer and immediately felt the benefit as his sharp finishing won us the first two games. Chris Todd and Stevie G got a bagfull whilst Chris Todd weighed in with a decent haul. Although my fellow sexagenarian Chris Anthony and myself only mustered three goals between us we worked our aging frames off to supply our younger team mates with the ammunition to fire the goals and stepped in at the other end to repel the attacking hordes'.
So a good night all round and hopefully if the boys in Sky Blue (not Cov James) can put it up José Mourinho's Chelsea tomorrow night we'll see City at the top of the Premier League - COME ON CITY        afternote - Oh dear!
 

Tonight's Teams

 
Mary's Moaners
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans

Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

REDS
Rick Pott
Dave Brown

James Kemp
Nigel Caldwell

SHIRTS
Chris Todd
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough

Steve Gerrard
Ade Hewitt

 

Sunday 9th February 2014 : As our weekly bash kicked off tonight, Stretford United were one down to bottom of the League Fulham which had the Blues amongst us purring. Yesterdays fine win by Liverpool against Arsenal had our Scouse fans equally in good spirit coupled with a rare win for Stockport County it looked like a good session was on the cards at the Leisure Centre. Well as far as I was concerned that was just as it turned out to be with the three teams all showing good spirit and much determination. The Reds launched into the contest with four straight wins to make their mark early doors. Anthony Graham and Rick Pott were hitting the target and looking good value especially with the sound defending by Nigel, Dave and James backing then up. Nothing lasts forever though and when My team the Shirts and The Reds both got going the balance shifted especially the Shirts who finished the session the strongest. Steve Gerrard has started banging in the goals again with good support from his team mates but with a little better passing all round we could have done a lot better. Mary's Moaners had Rick Evans as their main threat although Paulo Garner smacked in the two best goals of the night both long range specials. Johnboy has shaken the sand out of his shoes and is getting back into the thick of things and as usual Chris Podmore was buzzing like a brothels door bell. Anyway player of the week this week goes to Anthony Graham, top stuff from the Young Gun. So many examples tonight as to why we all love our Sunday night and long may it continue.
As we dragged our weary limbs out of the sports hall we heard that Mr Moyes' Stretford all Stars had made a fine comeback against Fulham to lead 2-1 with seconds to go only to concede a late equaliser to give bottom club Fulham a "lucky" point.......... 

Tonight's Teams

 
Mary's Moaners
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans

Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

REDS
Rick Pott
Dave Brown

James Kemp
Nigel Caldwell
Anthony Graham

SHIRTS
Chris Todd
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough

Steve Gerrard
Ade Hewitt
Keith Proudfoot

 

Sunday 16th February 2014 : I don't know if it was the atrocious weather of late or just something in the air but, there was definitely a testosterone tsunami washing over the sports hall tonight. Mary's Moaners gave us a timely reminder of why they are called thus in a session with much underlying dissension. Reminded me of my days refereeing Sunday League football when the most oft heard remark happened to be "how come they always get the decisions, we get **** all?"  Didn't like it then and I don't like it now.
Playing six a side without a ref was never going to be easy but you know what - we should know better. Regarding the actual games (first to ten) which Mary's took 2-1, there was much to admire between the moaning such as, Rick Evans ability to find the net after his many mazy runs, Chris Podmore and James Kemps admirable non stop harrying and 100% work rate to name a couple. However, when I see my mate Chris Anthony getting wound up like a coiled spring you know something's amiss. Thankfully after the end of the session in the dressing room, we gave him his Snicker Bar and all was well. Ade Hewitt, Rick Evans and Chris Podmore were Mary's main scorers well supported by Johnboy and, with Paulo Garner and Zsu Zsu holding the fort at the back they were quite formidable. It took a huge effort for my Shirts team to step up in the third game to pull one out of the bag. Chris Todd and Proudy upped the ante and gave us an early advantage. James Kemp suddenly became a goal poacher and we were away. Chris Anthony, Stevie G and myself added our two penarth with all our team scoring to finish off the evening with a fine win. James Kemp managed to avoid any major collisions this week probably due to Rick Pott not appearing but did manage to get Player of the Week for his late goal poaching performance.
Just as a matter of interest I'm preparing a few suggestions for rule changes at the moment such as if the goalkeeper commits a high ball, the opposition restarts the game with a free kick from the centre spot. Also the goalkeeper should only be allowed to roll the ball out as per FA Rules. Finally, deliberate hand ball should result in a penalty, I stress deliberate. If anybody has a further suggestion let either myself or Keith Mastin know and we'll print them up and put them to the vote 

 

Tonight's Teams

Mary's Moaners
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans

Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

Ade Hewitt


SHIRTS
Chris Todd
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough

Steve Gerrard
Keith Proudfoot

James Kemp

 

Sunday 23rd February 2014 : What makes a bazzin' session of five a side? Well three evenly balanced teams, hopefully up for a good challenge and, no bad vibes. Well we got just that tonight with some cracking games and lots of goals to remember. Mary's Moaners and the Reds were more or less inseparable for top team both giving it the full gun. Johnboy had a fine night finding the net on quite a few occasions with well taken strikes of the goal variety.  Zsu Zsu Mastin continues to defy the laws of football which state clearly that Cockneys are shite at football. Despite this the old hippie formed a formidable defence with Paulo Garner while Chris Podmore and Rick Evans did the business at the other end. The Reds were also on a roll with an incredibly hard working team which included player of the week Dan Bailey in his first game since mid January putting in a fine shift. Bolstered by "Steady Eddie" Nigel Caldwell who nipped in to stonk in a couple of blinders to add to the bag full from Anthony Graham, the Reds looked a good prospect for top team but Mary's were having none of that. My team the shirts were a mixed bag. With the League Cup Final at Wembley next Sunday Chris Anthony and myself naturally had other things on our mind - like going on holiday you don't want to get crocked the week before so just maybe we were only playing at 95%. Stevie Gerrard stepped up to main scorer and Proudy slammed in a couple of corkers but Ade Hewitt strangely hit a bit of a barren spot by his standards as did Chris Todd. Maybe next week while Chris and myself are at Wembley and the average age drops by a substantial amount they might just pick up a bit. Having said that, without Chris's darting wing play and my Silva'esque playmaking skills maybe not!!

NEW PAGE needed next week so give me something worthwhile to write about, in the mean time COME ON CITY.......

Tonight's Teams

 
Mary's Moaners
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans

Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

REDS
Rick Pott
Dan Bailey
James Kemp
Nigel Caldwell
Anthony Graham

SHIRTS
Chris Todd
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough

Steve Gerrard
Ade Hewitt
Keith Proudfoot

 


Sunday 2nd March 2004 : It could have been the new ball, or the nights getting lighter or perhaps the un nerving aluminous lime trainers Anthony was modelling. Whatever it was the fifteen veterans on show were up for it this evening putting in one hell of a shift. With no quarter asked or given. The first game of the night ended in a 1-1 draw between the Youth and the Bibs, then the goals started flying in. Steve Gerard playing loan striker lost count of his goal tally scoring from every angle. Supplied by the skill and guile of Ade Hewitt who also crashed in a few. This strong new look Tabard team also contained the creative Chris Todd and the dependable Nigel Caldwell, bolstered by Keith Proudfoot who struck from distance for one of the goals of the night. ( On this form Malc Hough and Chris Anthony may struggle to keep their places ).In contrast the Youth team were out of sorts nothing went to plan for them. Rick Westwood couldn’t get to grips with anything , although was still a regular scorer. Dave Brown and James Kemp ran their hearts out for this team, James finally rewarded scoring the last goal of the session in a 2-2 draw against Marys Moaners. Dan Bailey showed moments of quality and Anthony Graham christened his new boots with some sublime left and right footed finishes. But it just wasn’t their night.

Team of the week by a whisker, were the Moaners who put on a fine display. Chris Podmore covering every inch of the pitch and scoring some splendid goals. Rick Evans smashed in a few trade mark boomers, even Paulo got a bag full in this free scoring team. Jonny Boy went home happy having hit the back of the net past some of the better goal keepers on show. Captain Marvel Keith Mastin showed us all how it should be done side footing a classic slide ruler into the bottom corner which Anthony Graham could only watch and admire. Moaners and Tabards dealt out 5-1 thrashings to each other over the 90 minutes in this very enjoyable and high scoring nights football. Player of the week Steve Gerard was in brilliant form and played with a smile on his face all evening.( or was it trapped wind ? )

Good Humour, Banter, Sarcasm, just three of the reasons we all turn up . Oh and of course Football. ………………………Same again next week lads.

Many thanks go to our Guest Writer for a really good report
Tonight's Teams

 
Mary's Moaners
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Rick Evans

Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

TABARDS
Ade Hewitt
Steve Gerrard
Chris Todd
Nigel Caldwell
Keith Proudfoot

YOUTHAnthony Graham
James Kemp
Dan Bailey
Rick Westwood
Dave Brown

 

 


Sunday 9th March 2014 :
Not very often but, Some weeks we get the bare minimum of ten players turning out on a Sunday and you know it’s going to be hard to keep going for ninety minutes. This was one of those weeks. The Moaners drafted in Nigel and nicknamed the team 360 as his recruitment gave their side three sexagenarians ,propped up by Paulo and Chris Podmore. Their  Shirted opponents had the luxury of play makers Anthony Graham and Ade Hewitt. Bust a gut running machines Rick Pott and James Kemp plus “Blackburn till I die “ Keith Bigfoot ….sorry Proudfoot.

Not surprisingly the Moaners didn’t win any of the three games this evening, but they never gave up and showed some moments of quality. John Goodwin crashed a few home, and Keith Mastin got his replica long range side footer for the third week in a row. Poor old Chris Podmore did all the running and was rewarded with his fair share of goals. Nigel poked home a couple too. While Paulo wiped the smile of Anthony’s face with two quick strikes.

For the shirts Rick Pott scored at will. Anthony was just showing off really . Keith and Ade teamed up well and both scored some crackers. All however were second best to James Kemp who perhaps needs to take a drug test. He was everywhere, scoring for fun, tackling back, saving in goal. We were exhausted just watching him. I can’t remember him ever playing better and for that reason I award him player of the week.

Again a great report from our Guest writer.  Sadly my glorious Blues couldn't match the enthusiasm of the vets and went out of the FA Cup without too much fuss. As the distinct possibility looms at the Camp Nou that Barca will dump us out of the Champions League on Wednesday night they are now in with an out-side chance of the double. I know 90 odd more teams would love to be able to say that including our Stretford neighbours!!

Tonight's Teams

 
Mary's Moaners

Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Nigel Caldwell
Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

Shirts

Anthony Graham
Rick Pott
Ade Hewitt
Keith Proudfoot
James Kemp

 

 


Sunday 16th March 2014 :
After many years following Man City you learn to accept the ups and downs that go with the territory and in the last two weeks provided us Blues amongst the vets have tasted success at Wembley winning the League Cup, been dumped out of the FA Cup by Wigan and hoofed out of the Champions League by the best team in the world, Barcelona. As I said to Chris Podmore tonight it wasn't that long ago since we lost to Stockport County at Maine Road so for me it's a wonderful time to taste a bit of success even if that means a smattering of defeat. That aside, at the Leisure Centre tonight we had as good a 90 minutes as you could ever wish for with plenty to give you that feel good factor when you've had a good crack. Mary's Moaners were strangely quiet by their standards tonight, no assassinations, no moaning (honest) but just got on with the job and made a decent fist of doing just that. Maybe the addition of Dave Brown had a calming influence on the Popes Team. Mr Brown was in scoring mode and defended as resolutely as always earning him the Player of the week award. The Youth team were joined by new vet, Russell Hindley who slotted in nicely and looks to be a good addition to the group. Rick Pott managed to avoid any collisions with the floor or James Kemp and had a good session by any standards. My Shirts team just about shaded the top team award with Stevie G and Ade Hewitt notching most of our goals although Proudy, Chris and myself all weighed in with our share. Ade must have been delighted to have watched his Liverpool team destroy Stretford United 3-0 at OT and only hours later play in the same side as our own Steve Gerrard.
So another good week which I must admit was a bit of a bonus for me as I been having a few knee and muscle problems recently but the 2 week rest seems to have done the trick. It's sometime good to reflect on just how lucky we are to be
still playing every week, this came home to me a week or so ago when Steve Hart got in touch and this extract from the email puts it into proportion :  
I really miss the football on Sunday nights. I've been diagnosed with severe osteo-arthritis in both knees, and have been told I will need replacement knees, but have to put it off as long as possible. Good to see you are still playing and enjoying yourselves. I am so jealous.
Give my best regards to the lads who remember me, and you can pass on my sympathy to poor old David Moyes after the unfortunate result in Greece!  (not to mention Liverpool today - Malc)

Best wishes,   The haggis-eating Jocko, Steve Hart   http://www.getyourkitsout.com/hall%20of%20fame.htm

Tonight's Teams

 
Mary's Moaners
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Dave Brown
Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

 Shirts
Ade Hewitt
Steve Gerrard
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough
Keith Proudfoot

YOUTH TEAM
Anthony Graham

James Kemp
Rick Pott
Rick Westwood
Russell Hindley

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Sunday 23rd March 2014 :
A thoroughly enjoyable session at the Leisure Centre tonight with three very closely matched teams giving it the full gun. Nigel set the standard with a finely struck first goal of the night with his first touch. With Proudy not available my team the Shirts were somewhat disjointed although we put together some classic football but, once more the walls were hit more often than the net. Although we all rarely found the net Stevie Gerrard scored the pick of them with a superb back heel from an almost impossible angle. Mary's Moaners jostled with the Youth Team for team of the night with both teams sharing the honour. Paulo had a fine night with some trademark strikes together with Chris Podmore. For the Youth team, James Kemp, Dan Bailey and Rick Pott shared the scoring with Russell and Malc Stubbs putting in good shifts. Player of the week has to go to Dan Bailey who not only played a good 'un but produced some superb goalkeeping to boot. One particular save as he dived to stop a goal bound drive looked to have been too hot to handle but, as it looked to be going in Dan over head kicked it up and over the bar for an astonishing save.
Only blot on the night was an argy bargy over a disputed area appeal which rightly or wrongly caused a bit of a rumpus. There have been a call for a clearer list of rules which hopefully will prevent any misunderstandings in the future.
Big Derby on Tuesday when my glorious Blues meet our Neighbours from Stretford who for once are the underdogs, COME ON CITY...........

 Mary's Moaners
Paulo Garner
Chris Podmore
Nigel Caldwell
Keith Mastin
John Goodwin

 Shirts
Ade Hewitt
Steve Gerrard
Chris Anthony
Malc Hough

YOUTH TEAM

Dan Bailey

James Kemp
Rick Pott
Malc Stubbs
Russell Hindley

 

 

 

 

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